4 words: hood of his car
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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