Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
