Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (602): View more from Arizona

  OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now

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  (602): OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now http://tfl.nu/twmw
  Replies (6) Good night (982) Bad night (818)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.

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  (805): before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was. http://tfl.nu/5vrd
  Replies (41) Good night (5146) Bad night (1105)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Random question, how's your gag reflex these days

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  (315): Random question, how's your gag reflex these days http://tfl.nu/0fku
  Replies (10) Good night (4661) Bad night (967)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.

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  (703): threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased. http://tfl.nu/r0ay
  Replies (14) Good night (1044) Bad night (4164)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend

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  (636): i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend http://tfl.nu/jil2
  Replies (7) Good night (6443) Bad night (1073)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives

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  (616): But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives http://tfl.nu/2jnq
  Replies (7) Good night (2025) Bad night (1479)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.

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  (530): TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG. http://tfl.nu/gtt9
  Replies (6) Good night (2666) Bad night (969)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.

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  (714): I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off. http://tfl.nu/39nr
  Replies (10) Good night (2969) Bad night (781)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Who wants vodka and apple sauce

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  (608): Who wants vodka and apple sauce http://tfl.nu/g86m
  Replies (4) Good night (983) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready

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  (262): he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready http://tfl.nu/cfza
  Replies (10) Good night (933) Bad night (553)
• Favorite

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.

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  (339): I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever. http://tfl.nu/09i5
  Replies (1) Good night (852) Bad night (350)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.

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  (423): It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers. http://tfl.nu/qq58
  Replies (2) Good night (1372) Bad night (428)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.

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  (562): When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed. http://tfl.nu/ppx1
  Replies (0) Good night (657) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that

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  (630): They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that http://tfl.nu/580s
  Replies (4) Good night (893) Bad night (408)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.

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  (814): His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner. http://tfl.nu/lc68
  Replies (2) Good night (593) Bad night (198)

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