He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
