Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
