the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
