you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
