Apparently you make a good broom.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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