I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
