It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
