so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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