10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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