Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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