sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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