I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
