none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
