just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
