She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it penis luge time yet?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize