Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
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I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
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if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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