Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
