I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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