Texts From Last Night

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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.

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  (704): First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka. http://tfl.nu/gxhu
  Replies (16) Good night (4972) Bad night (991)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize

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  (937): dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize http://tfl.nu/5hy5
  Replies (17) Good night (3638) Bad night (841)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.

  (517): View more from Michigan

  Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.

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  (231): bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this. (517): Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one. http://tfl.nu/v0gx
  Replies (49) Good night (6382) Bad night (1607)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.

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  (432): His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex. http://tfl.nu/07s4
  Replies (9) Good night (3573) Bad night (1087)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass

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  (508): Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass http://tfl.nu/5gce
  Replies (26) Good night (4165) Bad night (1174)
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  (845): View more from New York

  she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.

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  (845): she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there. http://tfl.nu/dzx0
  Replies (3) Good night (2682) Bad night (814)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.

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  (724): Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours. http://tfl.nu/4ug0
  Replies (1) Good night (2339) Bad night (843)
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell

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  (601): answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell http://tfl.nu/66yz
  Replies (3) Good night (2010) Bad night (1346)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves

  (806): View more from Texas

  That's not technology. Doesn't count.

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  (702): The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves (806): That's not technology. Doesn't count. http://tfl.nu/x0wz
  Replies (3) Good night (1721) Bad night (797)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed

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  (715): 1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed http://tfl.nu/vbeb
  Replies (7) Good night (2313) Bad night (601)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.

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  (813): So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges. http://tfl.nu/t5l6
  Replies (6) Good night (1723) Bad night (537)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...

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  (+44): I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon... http://tfl.nu/zui4
  Replies (3) Good night (1280) Bad night (1137)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.

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  (402): I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody. http://tfl.nu/us3z
  Replies (5) Good night (702) Bad night (998)
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  (415): View more from California

  I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game

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  (415): I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game http://tfl.nu/4656
  Replies (5) Good night (979) Bad night (416)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night

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  (508): I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night http://tfl.nu/3slk
  Replies (2) Good night (445) Bad night (317)

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