Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize