Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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