This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
