Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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