Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
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