I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
