I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you win again, gameday.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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