He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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