Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
