how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
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