There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
