I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
