Where is the hickey?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
