Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
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I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
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I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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