so that wasnt chicken after all
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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