why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
