he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
