just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your like the ambassador to my penis.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize