Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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