DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I am never drinking with the goths again.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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