I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
