only if we run a train.
done.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
