a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
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