so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
