is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
