and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
