all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
you didnt know i had herpes?
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
