Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
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