just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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